Villanelle

I said “I'll try to write a villanelle.

The work's been slow. I wish I'd not begun.

Having written's joy, but writing's hell.

I barely can remember how to spell

these words. I thought I was John Donne;

I said “I'll try to write a villanelle”

I'm terrible at this, I feel unwell.

My tercets are unraveling one by one.

Having written's joy, but writing's hell

Perhaps I could quit now, and never tell.

I never did announce to anyone,

I said “I'll try to write a villanelle,

I hear, I think, a distant tolling bell:

is it for me? I wish I had a gun...

Having written's joy but writing's hell

I may let out a strangled desperate yell

If ever I can get this damn thing done.

I said “I'll try to write a villanelle.”

Having written's joy, but writing's hell.